MCM Race Report

i'm sitting here, staring at the blank screen trying to figure out what it is that i want to say about my race...i want to grab details of the day that lead logically to the end, but i can't really grasp those details...there are days when you set out on a run, a ride, walk on stage to perform, clear your throat to give a presentation and the magic just happens without you even having to think about any of it...j has described this as flow...you get up...load your power point deck...then an hour later you are getting asked brilliant questions and people are engaging with your ideas...yet you have no idea what it is you actually said...it just worked...

while there is flow...there is also its mirror image...it's a run, a ride a performance that just doesn't go the way that you practiced it ten thousand times before...there is not one catastrophic event that happens to throw the day off course...it's again some sort of magic that shifts everything a bit out of favor...you cannot point the finger at one thing...and yet it's not a total blow out either...it just doesn't work...and really you wish there was a particular reason...

i wish i did have a particular thing that i could point my finger at...i have a feeling that i can look and look and never find it...

the day began well enough....mom and dad and i walked about a mile from my hotel to the race start in the chilly dark...it was great to spend pre-race with them...watching the sun come up...watching all the runners wander in from different directions...comparing the start line with chicago last year...just seeing how the day begins...i was squished in the corral and ready to go...it all started out just fine...really slow crowded first mile...totally expected...saw michelle! wow...she passed me...and i just wanted to make sure i didn't exert too much in the beginning...hit mile one just about 9.30...ok not horrible...but also not great...there were some hills in the first section of the course and i had planned on being a little slow through there...and hopefully making up for that in the end after mile 20...

but well...it all just started to add up on me little by little...felt good through those first hills...then hit a road block at mile 6...it was a pace group...and a one lane road...literally no where to go...on the right was a wooded hillside on the left was a 4 foot tall stone wall...totally beautiful area to be running in...leaves changing....trees...park...totally pretty....but all i could do was get frustrated...and more and more pissed that i couldn't get around this group....finally made a big right turn...up a hill and i could get away...really...that really made me that upset...i was so happy to be less packed in...through a really pretty neighborhood...and recognized a few places from having driven around the day before...made up some time on a few of the down hills...and was coming up to the half feeling okay....and then i hit the half and something was going on...

i wish i knew what it was...but we were out on a point...along a road that was not shaded....sun was up...but it was in the 50's maybe at that point...but i started getting really hot...by the turn at the half i could feel myself not keeping a straight line while i ran...i knew that i was in trouble...but i kept saying it will pass... i did have a thought out there that i was going to either fall over and have my first DNF or was going to get tossed in medical after i crossed the line...

i started grabbing multiple waters and powerades at the aid stations...to make the sloppy run a little better but i ended up feeling sloshy...but just for a few minutes....then i would feel better...so that makes me think something was off with my hydration...odd for me....but i can happen...all the while i was telling my legs to pick it up...but they were not listening...and i am not one of those people who just gives up because it hurts...i was really trying to make my legs turn over but i just couldn't...i resolved to let go of my BQ...and hope that maybe the third time i try will be the lucky time...

by 16 i knew it was done...i was not even going to PR...and i just needed to stick it out and complete the race...no matter what the time was...so that is what i did...at this point miles slip by...in and out...i am aware of some...and not of others...there are a ton of spectators along the mall...but i am not looking around...i am looking at the ground...just shuffling along...waiting for the bridge from hell...and sticking with the nutrition plan as best i could...

saw jessica just after the mall...she was looking happy and spritely...i was happy that she was having a good day...i know how much she wanted a BQ...and she was going to get it...i thought to myself at that point...do i just not want it enough?...and i decided that was not the reason that i was not having a good day...and just kept running

the bridge is as bad as everyone says...not only is it like 2.5 miles long...it's up hill for  a lot of the way...and there were literal...2 marines on the bridge in the middle cheering...i did not allow myself to stop running...i kept running....and people were dropping like flies around me...finally got off the bridge and in to crystal city...

i was so happy to see something other than a bridge...and i knew i was about 4 miles from done...so i started to get a little bit happy again...i was waiting to see the pentagon...ben i thought of you as i was running on the bridge just past the pentagon...it made me smile...finally made the turn into arlington cemetery and the marine memorial...and up the "hill" at the end...yeah it's up...but it's not anything to be worried about...and then finally crossed the finish line...in 4.11...10 minutes slower than my first marathon...but much much more of a mental toughness day than i have experienced in a long time...

made my way through the masses of people back to my hotel and my family...can't thank my family enough for all of the support over the weekend....Bec and Josh had a brunch on saturday...big family dinner saturday night....then everyone was out there cheering all day for me...mile 10...16...right before the hill at the end...you guys were great...and i really could not have done it without you...it's nice to have the carrot of family at the end of the race...

so...it's been a week since my race...and all i have been doing is sleeping and eating...sleeping 10-12 hours a night the whole week after the race....makes me think i have been running on fumes for a bit now...i have been putting a lot of stress on myself for the last hmm...year...but this last three months or so have been especially bad...but i really didn't slow down to notice...again i can't put my finger on one reason why i didn't have the day i wanted but i have to give a nod to the pressure i have been under...i know that, at least, was a little contributor..

for now...i am officially not racing until 2011...time to finish the semester...exercise when i want for how long i want...and just try to give my body and my mind some time to heal and restore...a BQ will come...just not this year.